For the past three days, I’ve asked you to look inward.
What are you carrying alone?
When did you stop asking for help?
Who really knows you?
Today, I want you to look outward.
At your family.
And ask yourself:
What is my family learning from me?
Not from what I tell them.
From what I show them.
Because whether we realize it or not, the people closest to us are watching.
They’re Watching How You Live
Your children are learning what manhood looks like by watching the men around them.
They’re watching how you treat their mother.
How you respond when you’re angry.
How you handle disappointment.
How you speak about other people.
How you deal with failure.
How you treat someone who can do absolutely nothing for you.
They’re watching whether you keep your word.
They’re watching whether your faith is something you talk about on Sunday or something you live on Monday.
And here’s one we don’t talk about enough:
They’re watching what you do when you don’t have the answer.
Do you pretend?
Do you withdraw?
Do you become angry?
Do you try to control everything?
Or can you say:
“I don’t know.”
“I made a mistake.”
“I need some advice.”
“Would you pray with me?”
“I need help.”
Those words don’t diminish a man’s leadership.
Used with wisdom, they demonstrate it.
What Are You Teaching Them About Strength?
Think about your son.
What is he learning from you about being a man?
Is he learning that strength means never struggling?
Never showing emotion?
Never admitting you’re wrong?
Never asking anyone for help?
Now think about your daughter.
What is she learning from you about the kind of man she should expect to have in her life?
Our families don’t need perfect men.
They need present men.
Men of faith.
Men of character.
Men who take responsibility.
Men who can admit when they’re wrong.
Men who seek wisdom.
Men who know when to stand firm—and when to kneel before God.
Men who aren’t afraid to grow.
Your Example Becomes Their Permission
There’s something powerful that happens when a father is willing to say:
“I need help.”
He gives his family permission to do the same.
Your son learns that asking for help isn’t weakness.
Your daughter learns that strong men don’t have to hide behind pride.
Your wife learns that she doesn’t have to wonder what you’re carrying because you’re willing to communicate.
That’s leadership.
And that’s one of the reasons this conversation matters so much to me.
Why the American Family Renaissance Begins With the Man
This is at the heart of why I created the American Family Renaissance Men’s Summit.
If we want stronger families, we need stronger men.
But stronger doesn’t simply mean tougher.
It means restored.
Men grounded in God.
Men who know who they are.
Men willing to take responsibility for what happens next.
Men willing to seek wisdom and ask for help.
Because when a man changes, the impact rarely stops with him.
His marriage feels it.
His children see it.
His family experiences it.
And eventually, generations can be changed by it.
That’s why the American Family Renaissance begins with the man.
Build the Man. Strengthen the Family. Restore the Nation.
Your Challenge Today
Take a hard look at the example you’re setting.
Then ask yourself:
If my children followed my example exactly, would I be proud of the men and women they became?
Don’t answer too quickly.
Sit with it.
And if there’s something you need to change, change it.
If there’s a conversation you need to have, have it.
If there’s forgiveness you need to ask for, ask.
If there’s help you need, raise your hand.
Your family doesn’t need you to have everything figured out.
They need to see a man committed to becoming the man God has called him to be.
And they’re watching.
The Power of Asking for Help — Creating the American Family Renaissance
Eight world-class speakers. One transformational day. Built for men who are done drifting and ready to lead.
September 14, 2026 · Online · Join from anywhere
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Seats are limited. And I’ll say the obvious thing: registering for a summit about asking for help is asking for help. Start there.
Build the Man. Strengthen the Family. Restore the Nation.
About the Author
Mike Van Pelt (MVP) is the Founder of American Family Renaissance and True Man Life Coaching — a movement dedicated to restoring the foundation of God, Family, and Country by rebuilding the heart of the man. He is the author of True Man True Ways: A Roadmap of Discovery to the Masculine Heart, host of the True Man Podcast with 250+ episodes, and creator of the Master Class The 9 Marks of a Restored Man. Through coaching, speaking, and brotherhood, Mike helps Christian men break isolation, reclaim their God-given identity, and lead their families with faith, character, and conviction.
Know God. Know Yourself. Live Fully.
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